poetry for dinner


just came from another meeting with WILA. but this one was a special one, as it was the thanksgiving dinner of judge jun dumdum for the award he received for "Best Decision" (definitely, judges who write decisions on murder or rape cases that can actually hold your attention SHOULD be given awards), as well as for his and ma'am ging2x's 29th wedding anniversary.

it was also our first Writer-in-Focus session, and i was asked to be the guinea pig. oh well, what the heck, i don't take these things seriously, anyway (my public self is there, but my real private self is always somewhere else during these affairs), so i said yes.

it went pretty well, i think, although we spent more time on my creative process (how i write poetry, how i started, etc.), rather than on discussing my poems. i was looking forward to getting feedback, too, since i haven't really let people seriously read my "feeling" or intuitive poems, especially the ones i've written since the bacolod workshop, which (i feel) are very different from the "logical" poetry i wrote in college where i was surrounded by readers.

talked to ma'am marj (evasco) afterward, and she showed me where the line cuts could be improved.

here is one of the poems i read for discussion, my latest, without any revisions yet:

Leaks

 

We see them now,

hear them, even

when it doesn’t rain.

Faster. In places

we never thought

would.

 

On the ceiling,

brown lakes in

a barren white land

betray the places they

have begun to claim.

 

The upstairs bathroom

dripping to the dining

below is nothing yet

like the hole left gaping

when the kitchen roof fell.

 

We are told water always

seeks a way out. Or in.

When the floors start to dissolve,

will we sink, or will we swim?

 

for Josrique, who is learning to swim

011506

 

PS after i wrote this, i thought: this sounds like our country =P

Comments

  1. water is such an essential part of life but can be equally as devastating.

    i like the warning stain imagery.

    ReplyDelete
  2. cool! i love the brown lakes in barren white land. =) thanks again for helping me out with my poems before. your comments really taught me a lot. i'm still working on them. still hammering away.

    ReplyDelete
  3. thanks =) nothing like reality to give the best metaphors ;-)

    ReplyDelete

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